Week 3…this sucks!

I was a little late posting this but here is the update for week 3. I had to deal with some complications this week and I haven't really been feeling very good.  Actually, that's saying it nicely. I have felt like crap if i'm completely honest. The only good part in all of this is that I am down 15kg (33lbs). Yippee for me!

Feel free to comment and share. I would love to hear from anyone that is going through this or has gone through it. It gives me comfort to know that others have felt the same way and are now living perfectly normal lives. That is the goal…a perfectly normal life.

2 weeks Post-op

Two more days...

I am two days pre-op and I couldn't be more excited. Mum is here and school is out and life is great. 

I made a video about my pre-op haul. Lots of cool products that mum brought me from the States. 

Enjoy!http://youtu.be/XNB_DSsLXBM

Video Blog Update

I had another appointment with the Dr. today. So excited for all the changes that are happening.

Take a look and you'll know what's going on. I am really excited to share this journey with others. And please leave comments. I appreciate all feedback that I get.

Love you!

A Sunday Walk with Friends

Last Sunday we (Lina and I) went for a nice long walk with our friends Nadia and Murky. Along the way there was running and sniffing and kicking up mud but mostly there was a great time. I took along my camera to take pictures of Lina and the Murkster because my good friends Melissa and Steve were moving back to the states this week and I wanted to give them a cute picture of Lina. That might seem strange but they (Lina and Melissa and Steve) have a little love affair going on and I know they will miss her as much as we will miss them. Here are some of the adorable pictures of the two little monsters:

Crossing my fingers

So I mentioned the other day that I had exciting news and would tell you about it today.  It occurred to me after that it might only be exciting to me. Which it totally is.

Today I had an appointment with Dr. Berneis, my Endocrinologist. I had to see him because I have been accepted by the University of Zurich Hospital's Surgery department for bariatric surgery. Yup...it's finally happening. I am going to get this weight off once and for all.  I have been struggling more than ever with obesity. -Wow I hate that word so much. Don't you think fat is better? Anyway, in the past two + years since being in Switzerland I have gained 35lbs. That's in addition to the fifteen that I gained during Grad School and the twenty I gained when my relationship in AZ ended. So that's a total of 70lbs in the last 6 years. I am so embarrassed to put a number to what I've done to myself. And believe me, I know I did this to myself. 

Having said that, I have been overweight my entire life.  If there is a diet out there, I've tried it. I never had much success until I started taking the prescription drug Phentermine. It was like a miracle drug. I lost 60 lbs within 5 months. It changed my life drastically. Phentermine, however, is not a drug that you can stay on long term. It is an amphetamine and can cause serious cardiovascular problems. I had changed my habits drastically during my weight loss and even after I stopped taking the medication I was able to maintain my weight-loss for a couple of years. But as it often does, life got in the way and my use of food as an emotional crutch returned. And so here I am at the heaviest I've ever been hoping that this surgery will give me the help that I need to once again change my life. 

Before heading to the hospital today I made my very first video of what i hope to be many on this journey.  I didn't know what was happening today but now I can tell you. I had a blood test and a lengthy consultation with the Dr. regarding my nutritional and medical history. We discussed all the details of every diet that I have tried and every failure that usually followed. When we talked about the phentermine he explained that it is not approved in Switzerland and was a bit surprised that I had a doctor who was willing to prescribe it.  I was also given a take home "Cortisol" test that I must do in the next couple of days.  This test is quite simple, I just have to spit into the tissue type paper in the the test tube. 

So that's the plan for now. My next appointment is on 14th of February and I hope that we can schedule more of my tests at that appointment.  

I think I'll end with my stats.

weight 113.5kg

height 162

BMI 43

Can't wait to see those numbers change. 

It's been almost two years

I can't believe how long it's been since I last updated this blog. I think my focus was on my teaching blog and my personal posts fell by the wayside. 

It's time I get back on the horse, so to speak, and start blogging about the changes happening in my life. 

I'm still living and working in Switzerland. I still teach third grade at an International School in Zurich and loving my job. I become more and more passionate about teaching with each day that passes. I echo the words of Malcolm Gladwell...

In fact, researchers have settled on what they believe is the magic number for true expertise: ten thousand hours.

Malcolm Gladwell

I remember the first time I heard this. It was during my masters program and Tom Keys was trying to tell us that even practicing teachers needed years to become experts. It was an overwhelming thought then but even more so now. I learn more about myself as a teacher, a nurturer and a woman everyday I teach. But mostly I learn how little I really know. Now that is a scary thought. I believe teaching might be one of a few professions where you will never, ever get it perfect. But I'm still trying none the less. 

So that's work. My personal life revolved mostly around my pug Lina. 

She lights up my life and is my constant companion. She has to listen to all my strange ramblings, complaining and loud singing but she never complains a bit! Amazing!!

I'm getting ready for a big life changing event as well. Stay tuned for that. I should have an update in Wednesday. Cross your fingers for me because I need all the luck and prayers I can get. 

Until Wednesday. Xx

Causing Riot has a button

Here is the button for Causing Riot! in case you just feel the need to install it on your blog.  +

 
I am lucky to have had my new blog designed by Erika at The Honey Bunch. She was super easy to work with and the price can't be "bee"T. =

Click here to go directly to her site

Don't forget to follow Causing Riot and Pammy Loves for updates on all my new adventures!

Maya and Jason

Jason and Maya are gone again and their visit was way too short. I hope they come back really soon and that we do some more traveling together. They are such wonderful friends and I love Maya so much (Jason too). It made me realize just how much I miss my great friends back home.

I took some photos while they were here but Maya took the most and I’m waiting to get my copy of them.  In the meantime I’ve been playing around with a new app called PicFrame.

As you can see we did lots of eating and drinking and I loved every minute of it.  

More pictures to come when Maya sends them to me (hint, hint).

Im in love

I’m in love with Pip!!

I have always known that my style lies somewhere between chabby chic and ultra girly but I’ve never been able to really express what I meant.  Well now I can!  Meet Pip...

Pip is a company from the Netherlands that I discovered this past weekend.  All I can say is Wowsaw I’M IN LOVE!!!

Can’t wait to fill my life with as many of these fabulous treasures as my budget will allow.  Might have to re-think that Barcelona trip. Just kidding!

Hope you love it just as much!

Yet another blog...

Yup…I don’t have enough on my plate and I’ve added another blog. This one is very near and dear to my heart. Check it out…

Causing Riot

Getting pretty!!!

I’m so excited to finally have my guest room to a state where someone can actually stay.  And as you can see from some of the pictures...someone is already staying.  My friends Maya and Jason are here to visit me and I couldn’t be happier. It is so great to have visitors. 

I thought that if I make this room as appealing and lovely looking as possible I might have more visitors coming for a stay.  Think of it as a lovely bed and breakfast with all your meals included and internet in your room. Best part of all...it’s FREE!  So come visit.  I miss you all!

This is still the beginning. I want to paint the wall behind the computer a light pink and I have some cute pictures I’m going to hang.  I also want to create a really cute corkboard so if you have any ideas please let me know. I’m still debating on the curtains.  I bought white ones that I think would be better but I need to seam them first.  I also need to find two night stands but I would like something antique and not match-y match-y if possible.

But it’s ready for now so PLEASE come and visit soon! 

This is actually a dressing table but it works perfectly as a desk. I also think I want a white chair instead. 

Hard to see the Armoire really well but I love it!

Isn't this spread adorable?  IKEA has quite a few pink and flower inspired duvet covers right now.  How exciting!!

Just a little touch of the pink on the desk. =0)

I've almost finished the guest room...

I'm almost done with the guest room.  I'll post pictures as soon as it's done.  But I'm really loving it.  In fact I love it more than my bedroom, but that's not unusual for me.

So excited to share with you and see what your feedback is.

Pinterest, Easter and a new Printer

I have to be at Flick's for dinner in an hour and I look terrible.  This must, as a result, be a very quick post but I am happy to share fun things.  Especially after the downer post I subjected you all to a couple of days ago.  By the way, just as an update, I am feeling so much better!  

So...first things first!  PINTEREST!!! How am i so behind on this amazing site?  Why have I not known about this until now?  Well I have quickly rectified this situation and I am happy to be pinning away.  What a fantastic idea that is.  I so often see things that I know I need to keep track of and then when the time comes I can't find it anywhere.  Well no more of that, thank you very much!  

I went shopping with Rob and Jo today and I dragged them (much against their will) to Volkiland to the Casa.  I got some amazingly cute things including my new Easter centerpiece.  I would normally do this with a tree branch or a craft tree but I can’t find that here so this will have to do.  Don’t you just love it?  (It’s ok if you don’t, because I do!!)

You may have noticed that my new centerpiece is on top of what you might think is an ugly box.  But in fact it is my new PRINTER!!! I’m so excited to finally have a color laser printer.  I’ve installed it and already printed a couple of pages. 

Life is good! Now off to Flick’s to eat, drink and be merry.

P.S.  If you haven't been over to my teaching blog you should quickly have a peak.  I ordered a new teaching bag and it's so darn cute.  Check it out at Chalk and Slate!!!

The Beast Inside

I’ve had people ask me what it’s like to suffer from depression.  This has never been an easy question to answer.  Unless the one asking has a frame of reference it is very difficult to really understand.

I was diagnosed with chemical depression when I was 14 years old.  I started my journey along the path of antidepressants at that time.  I spent most of my 20’s going off and on my medication and paying for that inconsistency with a life full of extreme emotional swings. Towards the end of my twenties I started seeking counseling to help me with some childhood issues.  It was during these sessions that I learned more about my diagnosis.  My counselor explained to me that my chemical imbalance was to be treated like an insulin deficiency and that I had a responsibility to take my medication daily. 

Over the course of the last 7 years I have found the exact dosage and medication type that works best for me.  The medication that I take currently is Zoloft.  I used to be on two different medications but was switched to Zoloft to try and help combat my anxiety disorder as well.  The results have been fantastic for my daily mood stabilization. 

What is important to know, especially if you are not one of the 121 million people who have some form of depression, is that even with medication the “beat” as I call it, can rear its ugly head.

My beast has been raging an assault these last 5 days.  I have felt my sanity slipping at times and have succumbed to a murky fog that has chained me to my own emotional prison.  I am trapped inside my own pain and can see the beast attacking.  I am a rational person and I know that I have to fight.  But how does one fight when then the fog and the murk become too thick? 

I sometimes liken depression to swimming through a huge pool of jello.  You can’t drown in it but you have to work harder than you can ever imagine making it to the other side.  That’s where I am right now.  I am in an endless pool of jello, slowly fighting my way to the edge. 

Some wonder why, even with medication, the beast appears.  I don’t have an answer for that.  But I know from experience that without the medication the battle is a hopeless cause.   

LUZERN!!!

This past saturday I joined my friend Felicity on a little day trip to Luzern.  Luzern is located in central Switzerland.  It is located on the shore of Lake Luzern and has breath-taking views of Mount Pilatus and Rigi in the Swiss Alps.  The city itself is beautiful and a must see for anyone who visits here.

You can barely see the Alps because it was a bit overcast. 

 The old part of town is so beautiful and we walked around for several hours. The only trouble was that we went on a Sunday so everything was closed.  I saw some great things I would have loved to buy. 

This ivy took my breath away.  It was so beautiful and on top of the house it looks as if they have an amazing roof garden. 

Some of these buildings date back 300 years.  

That says that Von Goethe lodged here.  So cool.

This is the Kapellbrücke (Chapel Bridge). This wooden bridge was first erected in the 14th century.  It's really very beautiful!!

My favorite part of my visit to Luzern was to see this amazing sculpture again.  It's hard to comprehend from the pictures how large it is.  The Löwendenkmal  (Lion of Lucerne) is a sculpture that commemorates the Swiss Guards who were massacred in 1772 during the French Revolution.  

One thing I didn't know is that Mark Wain praised the sculpture as "the most mournful and moving piece of stone in the world."

I would have to agree!!!

It was a fabulous day and after our walk around town we went and had lunch at Hotel Des Alpes Restaurant.  It was delicious!